What Is a Dildo? A Beginner Guide

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A clear, judgment-free guide to dildos for total beginners — what they are, the types and materials, how to pick your first one, and how to use and clean it safely so it stays fun and worry-free.
What Is a Dildo, Exactly?
A dildo is a sex toy designed for penetration, usually shaped like a penis but available in many forms. It has no vibrating motor, which is the main thing that separates it from a vibrator.
Dildos are used for vaginal or anal stimulation, solo or with a partner. They come in countless sizes, shapes, and materials to suit different bodies and preferences.
The appeal is simple: a dildo offers firm, controllable penetration whenever you want it. It is one of the oldest and most popular sex toys in the world.
A dildo is a non-vibrating toy made for penetration. If it buzzes, it is a vibrator; if it is solid and still, it is a dildo, though some toys combine both.

What a dildo actually is
What Types and Materials of Dildos Are There?
Dildos come in several main types and materials, and the two choices go hand in hand. The most common types are classic, realistic, G-spot or prostate, suction-cup, and strap-on compatible models.
Classic and realistic dildos are the most beginner-friendly. Curved versions target internal hotspots, while suction-cup and harness-compatible ones open up hands-free and partnered play.
| Type | Best For | Beginner Pick? |
|---|---|---|
| Classic | Simple, straight, all-purpose use | Yes |
| Realistic | Lifelike look and feel | Yes |
| G-spot / Prostate | Curved to reach internal spots | Good next step |
| Suction-cup | Hands-free, stick to surfaces | Yes |
| Strap-on | Partnered play with a harness | Later |
What materials are dildos made from?
Body-safe silicone is the best material choice for most people because it is non-porous, easy to clean, and free from harmful chemicals. Other options include glass, stainless steel, and hard plastic, each with its own feel and care needs.
Avoid cheap, porous materials like jelly rubber, which can trap bacteria and irritate the body. Body-safe means non-porous and non-toxic, so the toy will not harbor bacteria or leach chemicals.
What about temperature play?
Glass and stainless steel can be warmed or cooled for extra sensation. They are also rigid and firm, which some people prefer over the slight give of silicone.
Curved dildos that target the prostate are popular for anal play and pegging alike. Our guide to What Is a Butt Plug covers another beginner-friendly toy worth knowing.

Dildo types and materials at a glance
How Do You Choose Your First Dildo?
You choose your first dildo by starting small, picking a body-safe material, and matching the shape to what you want to stimulate. Beginners do best with a modest size and a smooth, simple design.
Think about size, material, and whether you want features like a suction cup or a curve. Smaller is smarter for a first toy, since you can always size up once you know what you enjoy.
If anal play is your goal, always pick a toy with a flared base for safety. For the bigger picture on strap-on play, see our What Is Pegging Guide for Couples.

How to choose your first dildo
How Do You Use a Dildo?
You use a dildo by relaxing, applying plenty of lube, and going slowly at a pace that feels good. There is no single right way, so experiment with angles, speed, and pressure to find what you enjoy.
Warm up first with gentle external touching before any penetration. Generous lube makes everything smoother and more comfortable, especially for anal use where the body produces none of its own.
- Relax and warm up. Take your time and get comfortable before introducing the toy.
- Apply plenty of lube. Use a lube that matches your toy's material, and reapply as needed.
- Go slow. Ease in gently and let your body adjust to the sensation.
- Experiment. Try different angles, depths, and speeds to discover what feels best.
- Stop if it hurts. Discomfort means slow down or add lube, never force it.
Match your lube to your toy's material to avoid damage. Water-based lube works with everything, which makes it the safest all-round choice for beginners.

A simple way to start using a dildo
How Do You Clean a Dildo and Stay Safe?
You clean a dildo by washing it with warm water and mild soap before and after every use, and you stay safe by using body-safe materials and a flared base for anal play. Together, these habits prevent the most common problems beginners run into.
Non-porous silicone, glass, and steel toys can be cleaned most thoroughly, and some are fully waterproof. Always check whether your toy has a motor before submerging it, since some are only splash-proof.
| Material | How to Clean | Note |
|---|---|---|
| Silicone | Warm water and mild soap | Boilable if no motor |
| Glass | Warm soapy water | Inspect for chips first |
| Stainless steel | Warm soapy water | Very durable |
| Hard plastic | Wipe, avoid soaking motors | Often splash-proof only |
Store your dildo clean, dry, and ideally in a pouch away from other toys. Keeping silicone toys from touching each other prevents some materials from reacting over time.
How do you stay safe and avoid infections?
For anal use, a flared base is essential because it stops the toy from slipping in and getting stuck. Never use a toy without a flared base anally, as this is a genuine emergency-room risk.
Never move directly from anal to vaginal play without washing or a fresh condom. Sharing toys also calls for a condom or a thorough clean between partners.
Body-safe material, plenty of compatible lube, a flared base for anal play, and a proper clean before switching uses or partners. These habits keep dildo play comfortable and worry-free.

How to clean a dildo and stay safe
What Are the Most Common Beginner Mistakes?
Most beginner problems come from a few avoidable mistakes. Knowing them in advance makes your first experiences smoother and safer.
| Mistake | What To Do Instead |
|---|---|
| Starting too big | Begin with a small, modest size |
| Cheap porous material | Choose body-safe silicone, glass, or steel |
| Not enough lube | Use plenty and match it to the material |
| No flared base anally | Only use flared-base toys for anal play |
| Skipping cleaning | Wash before and after every single use |
The bottom line is simple: start small, pick body-safe materials, use plenty of lube, and keep things clean. Get those right and a dildo becomes a fun, safe addition to your sex life. To see where toys fit into broader play, browse our Types Of Sexual Kinks Complete Guide.

Common beginner mistakes to avoid
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the difference between a dildo and a vibrator?
The main difference is that a dildo does not vibrate while a vibrator does. A dildo is a solid toy made for penetration, whereas a vibrator uses a motor to create buzzing stimulation, and some toys combine both.
What size dildo should a beginner buy?
Beginners should buy a small to medium dildo rather than anything large. A modest size keeps the first experience comfortable, and you can always size up later once you know what you enjoy.
What lube should you use with a dildo?
Water-based lube is the safest choice because it works with every toy material. Silicone lube can damage silicone toys, so water-based is the simplest all-round option for beginners.
Are cheap dildos safe to use?
Cheap dildos made from porous materials like jelly rubber are not the safest choice, since they can trap bacteria and leach chemicals. Body-safe silicone, glass, or stainless steel is worth the small extra cost.
Key Takeaways
- A dildo is a non-vibrating penetration toy. If it buzzes it is a vibrator; if it is solid and still it is a dildo.
- Material matters most. Body-safe silicone, glass, or steel are non-porous, easy to clean, and worth choosing over cheap rubber.
- Start small and use lube. A modest size plus plenty of compatible lube makes the first experience comfortable.
- Clean and store properly. Wash before and after every use, and use a flared base for any anal play.
The takeaway is simple: pick a body-safe toy, start small, lube up, and keep it clean, and a dildo becomes one of the easiest ways to explore pleasure. For more honest guides and reviews across every niche, explore the top rated porn sites.